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Donuts with Dad

19 years 5 months ago #111489 by Debbieomi
Replied by Debbieomi on topic RE: Donuts with Dad
Thank you for sharing this Shawn, I will be including that info in our next newsletter. We had our donuts with dads a few weeks back and the smiles on the children's faces said it all!!! They were so proud to show dad around the school and I would venture to say that disciplinary problems were very low that day.Maybe after sharing these stats, we can fill our cafeterias three times over!!! Thanks again!
19 years 5 months ago #111488 by Shawn
Replied by Shawn on topic RE: Donuts with Dad
Found references to this here and on other sites

:cool:
• Children are more likely to get mostly A's if their fathers are involved in their schools. Among children in grades 6 through 12, the odds that children get mostly A's increase by 46 percent if fathers are highly involved in their schools and by 21 percent if fathers are moderately involved in their schools, compared with the children of little-involved men.
• Children enjoy school more when their fathers and mothers participate. The odds that children enjoy school are 30 percent higher if the fathers are moderately involved, and 55 percent higher if they are highly involved.
• Children are more likely to participate in extracurricular activities when their mothers and fathers are involved in their schools.
Source: Fathers' Involvement in Their Children's Schools
According to a 1997 study by the National Center for Education Statistics, children do better in school when their fathers are involved. The study found that children in two-parent families in which the father is highly involved get better grades, enjoy school more, and are less likely to repeat a grade, compared with kids from families in which only mothers are highly involved. In addition, the study found that children do better in school when their fathers take an active role even if their fathers do not live with them.
“The study tells me that if America’s dads got as involved as America’s moms in their children’s education, America’s children would be studying harder and getting a lot more A’s,” said former U.S. Secretary of Education Richard W. Riley.
Other studies show that fathers’ participation enhances children’s ability to make choices and solve problems. “One of the best predictors of whether kids succeed academically is the father’s involvement,” says James A. Levine, director of the The Fatherhood Project at the Families and Work Institute in New York City. First, says Levine, when a father shows an interest in a child’s schoolwork, the father’s values are clearly communicated to his child. And second, teachers take notice when fathers show up, he says. “The whole support system around the child gets more engaged. Mom is engaged, Dad is engaged, and so is the teacher. Dad acts as a trigger for the whole system.”

<font size=""1""><font color="#"black"">Liberalism is not an affilation its a curable disease. </font></font><br /><br><font color="#"gray"">~Wisdom of Shawnshuefus</font><br /><br><font color="#"blue""><font size=""1"">The punishment which the wise suffer, who refuse to take part in government, is...
19 years 6 months ago #111487 by Pearlie
Replied by Pearlie on topic RE: Donuts with Dad
Just wanted to add, so that no one would think I have not considered safety factors, that the use of power tools and other such risky activities would not be done in the presence of children, and to decrease any liability issues, would most likely be done at the power tool operators home in advance and hey - maybe a bunch of dads could do this together, hehe, and do whatever guys do when they get together in a garage without women and their children!!

And also, just wanted to add that since I stated "I have gotten to know quite a few dads at the school.", does not mean that my son has gotten to know them well, as he has a condition in which he has a decreased ability to be socially appropriate. Just thought I'd clear that up, but it is a moot point, since I'm trying to create family activies. [img]smile.gif[/img]
19 years 6 months ago #111486 by Pearlie
Replied by Pearlie on topic RE: Donuts with Dad
Tim,

I do appreciate your perspective, as well as everyone elses on this subject. I was wondering if you were going to chime in on the topic [img]smile.gif[/img]

I too, understand the importance and significance of involving dads in a child's school. That is why I have been trying to "brain storm" ideas for events that would ALSO involve dads. I am getting some details together on building a school float so that I can present the idea in an organized manner. Having my son in scouts and being the INVOLVED parent in a predominantly father/son organization, I have gotten to know quite a few dads at the school. I am hoping this float idea flies, and I am hoping many of the dads from scouting and other dads at the school would enjoy and take an interest in being involved in an activity such as this.

Being stereotypical, I think more than a few dads would come running to show off their "MANLY MAN" talents at using power tools, etc.

My intent is the same - to get them interested in SOMETHING, with the hopes that they will feel comfortable being involved in more school related functions, etc. ANY parent (barring other obligations) would have an oportunity to be involved in this activity, as there would be projects for all skills and talents. Since I would be volunteering my garage and home, children would be welcome with whatever parent is involved with them, thus making it a FAMILY event.

As far as grandparents being involved with the school, yes, my school could probably improve in this area. I'll have to "brain storm" some more on that one, but we do have a good turnout of grandparents at our Spring Fling, as it has become a successful community event.

As always, there will simply be parents who will never get involved, no matter what you try to entice them with.
19 years 6 months ago #111485 by library mom
Replied by library mom on topic RE: Donuts with Dad
Very, very well put Tim. It was nice to read a dad's view on this subject.

I'm planning to ask for this program to be implemented next year. Do you mind if I quote some of your posting?

Susan
19 years 6 months ago #111484 by Rockne
Replied by Rockne on topic RE: Donuts with Dad
Hi All --

First of all -- thanks for all the input. One thing is clear here: folks on both sides of this one have their hearts in the right place. It's a disagreement between people who care passionately about kids and schools. That's great.

And Pearlie -- I hope you'll continue to provide your perspective. It's extremely important for parent group leaders to listen openly and consider all feelings. If you feel this way, there are likely at least a few folks at every school who feel similarly. (Doesn't mean leaders have to accede 100% to every parent's wishes, but we have to be open-minded and accepting as leaders, lest we get -- maybe rightfully -- deemed a clique.)

That said, let me give you my perspective -- both as a dad and an involvement watcher -- on why events like Donuts with Dads and Muffins with Mom and Grandparents Day and International Night and a Dads Club and other "subset-specific" events/efforts are needed.

Yes, all parents should be extremely involved without heroic measures by the school or PTO. No doubt about it. And folks who are on this website generally think of involvement as second nature. "Of course I go to parent conferences and attend family events and PTO meetings. I would never think about not doing so."

But there's this whole huge set of parents for whom involvement is not nearly as presumed. They're busy. They're involved heavily in other volunteer efforts. They're taking care of a sick mother 24/7. They're working 2 jobs. They're painfully shy. They're lazy. They're really intimidated by school (perhaps because their own school experience was not so swell). Yadda. Yadda.

These are the folks we're trying to connect with. And while -- yes -- they should get involved because involvement is important, and it would be nice if there was some sort of required training for all parents before their kids got to school, that's just not reality. Therefore it's up to us as parent group leaders to reach out to parents in as many creative ways as possible. Parent Involvement is that important. Building parent involvement at school is the #1 job (by far) of parent group leaders.

Why Donuts with Dads? Because getting dads connected to school is really important. It leads to great things for kids and schools. (And not just for the kids of those dads -- research shows that higher involvement at school helps all kids in that school, not just the kids of the involved parents...) . While those dads shouldn't need special events to get them connected, they do. While meetings and other traditional events are open to dads, a huge percentage of dads have the *impression* that those events are ladies events. And therefore, many dads don't attend. Impressions are powerful.

Nice as it sounds, just sending out a newsletter that says: "No, really dads, our meetings aren't just for moms" won't do the trick. Dads don't read the newsletter and -- if they do -- many will remain skeptical.

But if we create a special event focused on Dads.... Child brings home an invitation that says "To Dad".... the event is at a time that supports a common Dad schedule... event is Dad-like (coffee and donuts, gym night, playground build...), then the odds of getting a good chunk of Dads to participate goes way up. And once they participate once and it's a successful event, then they're far more likely to come back a second time. And after that, they're far more likely to step into more traditional involvement settings, as well.

Plug grandparents into this discussion in place of Dads, and you really get the same result. Some kids have no living or close grandparents. Grandparents aren't likely to attend traditional involvement settings (PTO meeting). And having grandparents involved adds value to the school. Therefore, grandparent events are a nice solution.

Is it playing into stereotypes? Yes. Do the stereotypes have some truth to them? Yes. Does it work to build long-term parent involvement? In my experience, yes. Very well.

And involvement is so important for all kids.

That's my soap box. I do appreciate your perspective, Pearlie. I hope you see mine, as well. Groups that do choose to run subset-specific events will do well to keep your concerns in mind when designing their events.

Tim

[ 12-23-2004, 11:03 AM: Message edited by: Rockne ]

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