keep going, keep talking, keep smiling...you will win them over and if you don't the you volunteer so much that it makes them say "hey who is the new mom with all the time" they will see what a resource you can be! At the next meeting when the sheets are passed around, say oh yes I would love to do that but no one asked me...
serious...dont give up.Maybe they need to know you really want to help and wasn't there for a show!

I feel really badly that you had to go through that, but don't let your negative experience keep you from participating in the school. You can still volunteer in your child's classroom, go on field trips, help out in the office, etc. You don't necessarily have to be involved in the PTO. Good luck to you!

Consider it a gift, what youve learned.

Kids learn from parents. Chances are, their kids are the ones forming the clicks in the classrooms and on the playground, and are *maybe* also among the bullies.

Mama - I am so glad you chose to share with us. I am also one of those parents who are completely disgusted with our schools clicky PTO - so much so I haven't regularly attended this year. Instead I have chosen to work with my children's teachers, the priciple and other staff at the school to ensure things are moving forward. Yes this is a bit of operating in 'stealth mode' if you will but it is great to be regarded as a "awesome resource without the hassle."
Keep in touch and keep moving forward. We will all be here for you.

You cant control the actions of others, but it helps to understand them.

Mean girls grown up : adult women who are still queen bees, middle bees, and afraid to bees AUTHOR: Cheryl Dellasega

Queen bees and wannabes : a parent's guide to helping your daughter survive cliques, gossip, boyfriends, and other realities of adolescence AUTHOR Rosalind Wiseman

The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander AUTHOR Barabra Colarosso

MAMA1969 - tlch and Shawn are right! I am so proud of you. You attended a PTO meeting on your own. You attempted to get involved. You don't seem to be letting their attitude bring you down. Keep going back, find ways to get involved. Actually, I say call the president tomorrow, reintroduce yourself to her, discuss items brought up during the meeting and let her know how you will be helping.

Your group failed you in so many ways. I always do the following things for new folks at meetings:

1. Personally greet them prior to the meeting and offer a copy of the agenda.

2. Sit them at a table with seasoned members and make introductions.

3. Once the meeting is called to order I welcom and introduce the new members.

4. During the meeting, I make sure the new members are informed of the subjects and encourage them to participate.

5. After the meeting I catch back up with them on the way out, ask if they have any questions, comments, etc.

Even if your new group has a high percentage of snotheads (a term recently used on these boards that I LOVE), the leadership team should step outside of the clique and make everyone feel welcome.

The great news for you is that this place is NOT a clique. Everyone is welcome, encouraged, helped, celebrated. I hope you continue to come here and share your experiences so we can learn from you too!

[ 10-05-2006, 10:36 PM: Message edited by: CrewChief ]