I can understand your frustration with feeling like the PTO board is ignoring you. Seeing that you sent the letter to two people and neither of them responded it could be that they just don't want to listen to new ideas. It could also be as the last person said that they had the best of intentions and just forgot to get back to you. You sound like you're really excited about volunteering and maybe if you talked to them face to face you could see if they really are a clique or they just were overwhelmed at the time you wrote them. I am a PTO president and I really do try to answer every phone message and note in my box, and send a thank you note to every volunteer. However as hard as I've tried I am sure there is at least one person out there who thinks I have over looked them or they feel unappreciated. I know if it were me I would like the second chance to make amends. Keep up the good work and if it doesn't work out at least you know you tried.

I've been on both sides of this and have found that ANY established group (work, professional orgs, PTO's, etc.) may seem too much of a clique when someone first tries to get involved.

The members have a history, established relationships, and a context for what's being discussed. Yes - it's definitely their responsibility to try to welcome new people. But it's also the responsibility of new people to recognize they might feel like an outsider at first. So I'd recommend you don't give up. After a 2 or 3 meetings, things should start seeming more familiar.

As far as the email, I'd follow up in person before I'd condemn the president as ignoring you. There are so many things that could have happened. There may have been a technical problem and she didn't get it. Sometimes it's hard to weed out the personal mail from the junk mail - it may have accidentally gone into her junk mail folder. Maybe she was in a time crunch and put it aside for "later". Maybe she simply forgot. Maybe she asked someone else to get in touch with you and that person failed to follow through.

PTO's are usually eager for new volunteers. Give them another chance.

I'm pretty new to public schools and PTOs. My son's been in this school for a little over 2 years now, and so far I've tried to pitch in as much as possible, be it purchasing the ubiquitous gift wrap, baking cakes for the new family welcome, helping with book fairs, etc.

This year is the first time I attended a PTO meeting. I have to say, it really wasn't much fun. It's a well-established PTO, and had the general feel of 'cliquish-ness', if that makes sense.

Since I have volunteered for a number of things, I mulled over different ideas I'd had and wrote an email to the PTO president, whom I know casually. I pitched some ideas for possible fund-raisers, communication tools that parents might enjoy, etc. This was a VERY low-key email. Part of what I wanted to accomplish was to gauge reaction to such an email from a parent who wasn't part of the board.

Well, I didn't expect anyone to fall all over me, thanking me for my thoughts, lol. But neither did I quite expect no response at all. I had also sent an email to the fundraising chairman, telling her about a new escrip partner and what I had to do to sign up my account to participate in that. Heard nothing at all from her, either.

I have to say, this baffles me somewhat. I even printed my email out and had someone else read it, since I wondered if maybe I came off sounding arrogant, or ignorant, or somehow offensive. The answer was NO. It was just friendly and low-key.

My friends (not from this school) dismiss this, and say that it's a power thing, that PTO board members are territorial and don't particularly want people around them who aren't 'one of them', so to speak. This seems like the other extreme of various posts I've read here, where people are looking for ways to get parents interested. Has anyone else encountered this kind of thing? I haven't attended a PTO meeting since; I understand the last one had 6 people there. That seems awfully low! Frankly, this has now soured me on the idea of doing very much by way of helping out at fairs, etc. Luckily, I like my son's teacher very much, and the room mom from his class has called on me to help with class activities (which I love doing!) And I help in the library, which I also enjoy. But that's about it, and it's much less than I'd planned on doing.

Any thoughts on this situation? I should add that many parents are PTO members (though, like me, few apparently attend the meetings) and most of the PTO activities seem quite successful. In my email to the PTO president I thanked her for all the work they've done. There's no question that this PTO works, it just seems like a closed organization that works best by itself...