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Less than stellar PTO experience

19 years 7 months ago #111335 by Michelle B
In the interest of time (being one of those busy but needs this place, people) there is another possibility. Perhaps if you didn't ask for a reply than she considered your suggestions but didn't reply because it wasn't expected (I will almost always reply with a thank you for your suggestion or something more elaborate but some people don't think that way- the case of the non-Thank you card writers for instance.

And the junk e-mail, or they have an e-mail address but their husband downloads the ones he thinks she needs to read (I have a few Presidents that do this because they don't understand e-mail but see the need to have an e-mail address) and prints them for her, Others may share the address, like teenagers, and it could have been deleted by a second party. There are so many possible scenarios that could make either of these women faultless. It is best to speak face to face to make certain that it was received.
This is a time when first impressions shouldn't be the last impression, it takes time to get know how your group works.
19 years 7 months ago #111334 by pam1500
Thanks everyone for your posts... it's helpful having different points of view. It's certainly true that people can get swamped. I figure I'll attend the next meeting, sit quietly somewhere, and before or after the meeting privately ask the prez if she got the email, try to gauge her reaction.

I can see how people's "good ideas" can become something of a problem. Excellent point! It's certainly something to be sensitive to. Anyway, I'll stay involved in the school as much as I can, even outside of the PTO if I must, but... I won't give up yet! Thanks again.

Pam
19 years 7 months ago #111333 by melloweer
Replied by melloweer on topic RE: Less than stellar PTO experience
I'd be willing to bet her lack of response to your email so far has nothing to do with lazyness and unwilling to respond. I have to share this, just so you see a different point of view. I am my son's school fundraising chair. We held an auction a few weeks ago and I have not had a chance to get the 350 letters typed up, signed, and mailed out or sent home with students. I just received an email yesterday basically chewing me out from a parent that had donated something to the auction and had not been thanked in a letter. I mean a real chewing out. I emailed her back and polietly let her know...lets see since the auction my grandmother has become seriously ill and could die any day, my 4 year old has had a serious ear infection plus a cold, I moved into a new house, and I had to fly out to Arizona because my father (who I haven't talked to in 8 years) was on his deathbed. Sometimes PTO chairs/officers can't get to it right away cause other stuff interferes. I'm sure they took your ideas to heart and just haven't had a chance to talk to you. Please do not take it personal.
19 years 7 months ago #111332 by cristi
Replied by cristi on topic RE: Less than stellar PTO experience
hello....

I am a fence sitter when it comes to this subject. I see both sides because I am my schools PTO president.....but I am also in Non-profit management(volunteer management to be exact, and know the value oand need of a good volunteer. Anyhow, like other posts have said some ladies get on a "power trip" and they like being in control of everything....but one thing I have had to deal with at my school is people give me wonderful ideas...and I let them run with it....only to have egg on my face later. Example: grandparents day....one mom had an idea to have krispy cremes cater our event..(great idea)....so we got on krispy cremes' delivery schedule. Krispy cremes was delivering at 5:00am. This mother was so gung-ho and I was happy for her. The morning of the event, 4:51am to be exact I get a phone call at home. You guessed it, from this mother. Her child had been sick all night and she was not going to be able to make it to the school. So whos shoulders did it fall on??? You guessed it again...MINE. I have others stories I could tell like that one. My point is maybe this PTO president has had something like this happen to her before...who knows.

My suggestion to you is not to give up, being involved in your childs school is important...and with any new venture there is a uncomfortable period. Instead of e-mailing (which is so impersonable) try talking to her face to face. See why your ideas we thrown by the way side. Tell her your intentions are genuine. It is sad to say but you may have to prove yourself.

Hope I helped.

Cristi
19 years 7 months ago #111331 by <Sally>
Replied by <Sally> on topic RE: Less than stellar PTO experience
Hi Pam,

Your situation sounds similiar to mine. I attended 3 meetings - (very few non-board members do) and I was actually asked to submit ideas for bringing in more members. I sent an e-mail with many ideas to the prez. - she did thank me and said she liked many of my ideas - as did others on the board. Well - things are still being conducted in the same manner and no implementations of my ideas. These are not ideas that need special approval of the principal or anything.

I'm a stubborn old coot tho - and I plan on sticking around and hopefully become part of the solution and SLOWLY bring in some needed changes.
19 years 7 months ago #111330 by pals
Pam I would approach them in person. being a PTO president is alot of work and it takes alot of your time. There are little things that leaders do that others don't see. There have been times that I have failed to response right away, not because I didn't want to but maybe it came right before our big fall fest, or during a fundraising fiasco that no one knew about. There are times that those memos get put in a pile and i do get to them but if it is a matter of opening the kindness store for the 125 kids who get to come that week or answering a e-mail about fundraising I have to do the store thing. There are priorities that need to be made and in my situation I have taken ideas to principal and have had to wait to hear from her or our district. there are alot of reasons why...ask in person and i bet you get an answer. sometimes people get afraid when someone new comes around and wants to change things right away. speaking from experiences I have had parents start something and leave us hanging with the project they wanted so bad... give it a chance and see what happens.

"When you stop learning you stop growing."
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