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Offended by new PTO

18 years 1 month ago #103954 by Laney
Replied by Laney on topic RE: Offended by new PTO
Its OK to be offended- for about a minute= then get over it and do what you can to help them along. Yes we know the blood, sweat and tears you have given- these people will figure it out too. I've been where you are and I finally thought that if someone else could do a better job then who am I to stand in their way. I agree with CapeDad that changes need to be made gradually. It sounds like they are excited and we can only hope that they don't go overboard and mess it all up. That is what happened with our group and I am now back to being offended and mad- I worked for over 4 years to make our group topnotch and these people screwed it up in less then a year!!

Try to give them room to grow and make their mistakes and be there to help them get through it all. And be proud that you left them with a leg to stand on- and that they feel confident that they can take it to the next level.

[ 05-30-2006, 11:47 PM: Message edited by: Laney ]
18 years 2 months ago #103953 by queen4thekids
Replied by queen4thekids on topic RE: Offended by new PTO
I think you have truly given them something to be excited about. It sounds to me that this is a compliment to you and your board. You must have led them in a way that made them want to do this and want to help out. So be proud of yourself. Because now you can take a little time and sit back and enjoy it all. Sometimes, the excitement is becase it is all so new and fresh. But just remember, that you and your board have done something right to get this off to such an exciting start for them. Be proud!
18 years 2 months ago #103952 by <Servedmytime>
Replied by <Servedmytime> on topic RE: Offended by new PTO
maybe replace teacher with ex-PTO leader:

The true aim of everyone who aspires to be a teacher should be not to impart his own opinions, but to kindle minds. Frederick Robertson

sounds like youve kindled the minds of your sucessors! so youve done the best job possible and should feel honored theyre so motivated.
18 years 2 months ago #103951 by CapeDad
Replied by CapeDad on topic RE: Offended by new PTO
To address your specific questions:

You are not crazy for feeling a little offended.

You don't really have a right to be offended.

If you are no longer leading, it is not fair to those who are for you to ask them to do things your way.

Ideally, these changes should be gradual. One year you have a new dance chair shake it up, the next your spring carnival, the next an ambitious treasurer wants to revise your fiscal policy. That way, you are keeping the old and changing with the new people.

Give them a chance, too. Everything is in the early stages. They will discover that some of their new ideas are great while others are not so great, and they have your experience and tradition to draw from when they need to adjust.

You need to let go a little.

My goal is to have leaders that want to take all of the things we have started and run with them before I am ready to step down as president. I envy your situation.

If you don't expect too much from me, you might not be let down. <img src=images/smilies/smile.gif>
18 years 2 months ago #103950 by dlf
Replied by dlf on topic RE: Offended by new PTO
At the last organization I worked with we used to have a saying when the new leader came in. We would cheer "The King is dead, long live the King". Maybe a little extreme but the reality is that you should feel good about where they are going. It is the sign of a healthy organization when they can just step in and move forward seemlessly with their own touch on what is going on. They're excited and as full of energy as you were oh so long ago when you first came in. Without the organization you built however, they could never be doing what they are doing. So don't get upset. Cheer them on. It'll show that you really were looking for the new folks to come in and head in new directions. I would be very proud of the fact that you instilled in this new group the belief that they can come in and get running with their own ideas. If it weren't for you and your team, they'd still be looking for the hallway passes.
dianna
18 years 2 months ago #103949 by ScottMom#1
Replied by ScottMom#1 on topic RE: Offended by new PTO
I am starting my 6th year with our PTO. We have to have the basics of our year planned by May to make it to the school calendar printing.
Try looking at how excited they are to get started helping not how much they are trying to change and try not to take it so personally. They too are trying to do what they think is best for the school.

The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating-in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life. --Anne Morris
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