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PTO Pres. Gossiping about KIDS! Help!

17 years 3 months ago #131061 by LuckyMom2
Replied by LuckyMom2 on topic RE: PTO Pres. Gossiping about KIDS! Help!
some schools actually dont allow any volunteers, so as not tohave to deal with these kinds of uber-involved parent issues.

there is NO WAY to stop parents from talking about what they learned while volunteering at school. none. people have always gossiped and always will.

voting such officers out of office is the only thing you can do. but that wont stop the rumormongering.

having the principal talk to the pres will just put the gossiping where you cant hear it --- so maybe be glad you heard what you heard, so are aware of whats going on and how it may affect your child, so you can be an advocate for your child.

some parents have uncommon sense and you will never chnage them.

I would be mainly concerned if you can confirm that a STAFF member is leaking confidential information to other parents (also, some parents are part time staff, they too (just like parent volunteers) learn ALOT of things about ie special needs kids etc and other confid infos, and they also socialize with other parents.....its hard to deal with these kind of leaks....unless you can pinpoint them)

the best you can hope for is a supportive principal with a code of ethics and that herself is not a 'loose lips' type of person with those over involved parents that shower staff wtih gifts.
17 years 3 months ago #131051 by LuckyMom2
Replied by LuckyMom2 on topic RE: PTO Pres. Gossiping about KIDS! Help!
oh and, depending on whats goin on in your parent circle, these might be useful reads for you:

Mean Girls All Grown Up - Surviving catty women by haley dimarco

Queen bee moms and king pin dads by Rosalind Wiseman
17 years 3 months ago #131049 by LuckyMom2
Replied by LuckyMom2 on topic RE: PTO Pres. Gossiping about KIDS! Help!
first things first.
have you confronted the person in question, to verify what she said and did she in fact say it?

i dont know where you 'heard' that she was gossiping about your child, it ALWAYS pays to talk face to face to make sure that you yourself, are not hearing 'gossip about the pres of the PTO' and false words are being attributed to her.

you really need to confront that individual, and while you are at it, and it IS all verified, ask where she got her confidential info and then talk to THAT person. probably better than going SOLELY to the admin with your concern (but its good that you did).
take the matter into your own hands.
17 years 3 months ago #131047 by LuckyMom2
Replied by LuckyMom2 on topic RE: PTO Pres. Gossiping about KIDS! Help!
I meant to add my all time favorite quote......

It takes an enormous leap of faith to expect the people who caused our problems to solve our problems.(authour unknown)

If you are at a public school, then you are a bit in a pickle if the management doesnt handle this problem dicisively. You have to think of your child first and do what is best and what is within your options.
17 years 3 months ago #131046 by LuckyMom2
Replied by LuckyMom2 on topic RE: PTO Pres. Gossiping about KIDS! Help!
the counselor should not be worried that someone is LYING about a child (it could also be simple hearsay that got twisted and turned and now SOUNDS like lying), but that someone has received confidential information at all.

if its a serious breach of sensitive ie medical or other, then your staff donst follow the educator code of conduct rules. you can talk to the prinicpal or superintendent or school board, or file a complaint with the state board of ed. good luck.

and if in fact you have a group of parents who routinely are privy to confidential infos from the staff then you have a weak leadership there and it will probably get worse before it gets better.
17 years 3 months ago #131033 by LUVMYKIDS
As Crew Chief points out, volunteers can sometimes find themselves with knowledge of a student that shouldn't be shared. Our volunteers are given written direction that any information they have about a student due to their work in the school and classrooms is confidential and can not be shared even with the child's parents. If a volunteer was found discussing confidential information they would be removed from their volunteer services and I could even see the principal banning them from the school if it was deemed necessary.

Perhaps you could recommend to the principal that a formal volunteer confidentiality program of some kind be put into place immediately. It sounds like the staff is being handled, but it might be good to reinforce this policy with the parents of the school too.

Shame on the President for abusing her position in such a way, and I must agree that she probably isn't the right person to be leading your group.

Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat.
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