As a new PTO president and a former teacher, I am trying something this year that might be helpful for you. I don't know if you have heard the story about the geese (see below)and how they support each other as they fly but I shared that will my board and told them that this year I would really like us to try honking for each other. At each meeting I pick out a couple of people that have done something to make our meeting, and event or something go well for PTO and give them a HONK! for a great job. At first I think they thought it was corny but wouldn't you know it the person that I thought I was going to have the most trouble with this year actually sent me a honk the other day. Just an idea. I have added the write up about the geese below.
Good luck!
The Geese Story
Geese flying in a V-formation have always been a welcome sign of spring as well as a sign that heralds the coming of winter. Not only is this a marvelous sight, but there are some remarkable lessons that we can learn from the flight of the geese, because all that they do has significance.
As each goose flaps its wings, it creates an uplift for others behind it. There is 71 percent more flying range in V-formation than in flying alone.
Lesson: People who share a common direction and sense of purpose can get there more quickly.
Whenever a goose flies out of formation, it feels drag and tries to get back into position.
Lesson: It’s harder to do something alone than together.
When the lead goose gets tired, it rotates back into the formation and another goose flies at the head.
Lesson: Shared leadership and interdependence give us each a chance to lead as well as an opportunity to rest.
The geese flying in the rear of the formation honk to encourage those up front to keep up their speed.
Lesson: Encouragement is motivating. We need to make sure our “honking: is encouraging - and not discouraging.
When a goose gets sick or wounded and falls, two geese fall out and stay with it until it revives or dies. They then catch up or join another flock.
Lesson: We may all need help from time to time. We should stand by our colleagues in difficult times.
great advices above. stay at the adult level and ignore the gossip and rumor thats all it is, it is never the truth anyway (There is no part of the body which varies so much as the human ear. ~ Sherlock Holmes) and serves no constructive purpose. is simply a reflection of not that being talked about, but more likely, a sad commentary on the person doing the hollow talking.
You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts; and when you can no longer dwell in the solitude of your heart you live in your lips, and sound is a diversion and a pastime. And in much of your talking, thinking is half murdered. For thought is a bird of space, that in a cage of words may indeed unfold it swings but cannot fly. Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet
You will set the impact that these folks are having on your organization. I wouldn't address any of their issues, rumors etc except by having a information "This is your PTO" meeting to brief everyone on your mission, goals, and where this board's vision is pointing for the group. If they have a question about some of your decisions-and they raise them publicly then address them. If not ignore them. If someone passes on a rumor they are spreading--say to that person "I'm sorry to hear they think that. Our board's goal is to make this year a fun, educational, growing experience for all the children. I hope if they have any constructive ideas they will raise them with us cause we sure do appreciate their experience". When they raise their ideas -- VOTE. If the group doesn't like them, move on. Trust me...that response will get back to them and they will be dumbfounded as to how you can be so professional about their comments. It ain't worth it to crawl down off the sidewalk into the gutter. As I've said before--it's hard for folks to talk bad about you when you're talking good about them.
How about just having the President(is that you?) give a kind of "pep talk" at the beginning of the meeting about the mission and goals of the group and how "we all have the same goal-to make our school a great place for our kids". Then just put out a general request for anyone with any tips or info on past programs and events to help you out by passing that valuable info on to the new board and committee chairs.
As for their badmouthing-be the bigger person and ignore the comments, continue to be nice to these people and solicit their help and advice. If they make a comment directly to you or someone else approaches you about one of their comments, just tell them that you're sorry that there seem to be such negative feelings and that you admire the efforts they put forth last year and would appreciate any constructive help they could provide this year, but you are not going to argue, gossip, or belittle anyone.
Help! We have some parents that are bad mouthing our new officers and spreading rumors about PTO. We need a nice way to tell them to stay home if they don't want to be a part of the PTO. They are past officers that wanted to dissolve the PTO last year but this year feel they need to be informed of every decision made and are keeping information that could help the current board secret. Anyone have any ideas, poems, sayings we could use at our next meeting? Thanks.
