Thank goodness one of our "dynamic duo" is leaving, but then that leads to another posting I have about mothers being secretaries at the school--a mom who is friendly with the secretary leaving is vying for the position, and this is a person you would NOT want knowing ANYONE'S personal business. We're all praying the superintendent and board will look past the principal's recommendation (she seems to listen to all the wrong people), and opts to hire from out of town.

I hapened to hear one of the secretaries positively SCREAM at a student the other day (she was feeling put upon apparently), and was appalled that the principal didn't come out of her office to reprimand her.

You are not alone! When I read your post, I could only nod my head - we have the same situation at our school.

I suppose we are lucky, as we are part of a large school district, and there is a way to complain. It still has to start with the principal, however, and your own desire to make a change. It's a hard thing to undertake, when your time and energy could be spent on better things.

I wish I could offer advice. When you can't work with someone, you sometimes have to work around them.

Thanks for the feedback. I needed to vent! Even before I was involved in the PTA, as an appreciative parent I always made sure I brought a BIG bag of Lindt truffles at Christmas, and always gave them a card and a gift certificate on Secretaries Day. I also know a lot of other parents do too, and as one of the women is best friends with the PTA president, the PTA is always very generous in doling out thank yous and presents. I get irritated because they have it pretty good, most people in our school are curteous if not nice, and yet they act like they have it worse than anyone could ever imagine.

The last straw for me was when I went in after school one day, and asked VERY NICELY if I could leave a box (the size of a shoebox) in the office to collect any of their used ink cartridges for the recycling program. The one looked at me like I'd grown a third eye and asked me what I was talking about (despite the fact that I'd sent flyers out days before). I explained (in a nice voice) the program, and she just...looked at me. The other asked what was going on, and before I could finish, she said, "oh what, ANOTHER thing we have to look after?" I said, "Oh, I'm sorry--if it's too much trouble that's OK," and beat a retreat. Meanwhile three mothers in the hallway heard this exchange, and one told me I was crazy for even asking, and another told me I should have thrown the box at her! After this, one of the teachers suggested I leave a container (the size of a quart container from the deli) in the office to collect change from visitors etctera for our spare change drive that we're sponsoring for our new playground. Not wanting to say anything negative, I said I wouldn't want to bother them. She gave me a knowing look and said, "you know what, let me try." She went, she tried, she got an "obnxoious," "you're kidding me, right? We can't be asking people for money. How would it look?" "The teacher replied, "Like you cared," and dropped the matter.

Most people are afraid to complain for fear of retribution--our town is very political, and knowing the right people can take you a long way, and assure you a lot of privileges. You're right though, I suppose if enough people say something they can't ignore it.

[ 04-05-2004, 03:46 PM: Message edited by: kmamom ]

I'll admit - my first reaction was "show appreciation" but then I finished reading your post. (As a board at my previous elementary we took turns showing up every few weeks with either cookies, donuts, muffins - something - just for the office staff. They were blown away that we weren't just signing in to drop them off somewhere else, but that they were REALLY for the secretaries. It stinks that we have to suck up to others to make our volunteer positions easier, but you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes to make it bearable.)

If several different people approach the principal with similar concerns he/she won't have much choice but to address it. If you are having trouble getting through the secretaries to get in to see the principal - you can email him/her. My suggestion on email - however - is to take the emotion out of it. Write your email - walk away, have a cup of coffee, take a shower, something, then read it again before you click that "send" button. Remember - anything you say in email can be printed and read by others or forwarded. Stick to the facts.

Like the topic header said:

What do you do with problem office staff without exacerbating an already delicate situation or creating some sort of "war" by "tattling?"

We have two "secretaries" who rule the roost in our front office. They've been there since dirt was formed, and are shall we say, "difficult." They seem to intimidate our principal and a good number of people in the school, because if they're against you, WATCH OUT. Things get "lost" or "misfiled," and sometimes they "never got it!" They are very careful to outwardly veil their behavior, and usually show a "poor me" face.

While I understand they DO have work to do, and that their job is hardly easy, it could be done a lot more efficiently and easily with: 1)LESS GOSSIPING, 2)Less harrassment of people (our board members have received calls at 7:30 in the morning DEMANDING paperwork for things that DON'T concern them) and 3)a smile on their face and a BETTER ATTITUDE. Favors are readily granted to their personal friends, but to anyone else...? Can you tell I'm harboring some resentment?

Maturity tells me to discuss this with the principal, but reality says,"forgettaboutit." You'll come off as some kind of whiner despite valid complaints, and I know our principal will be hesitant to broach the subject with them. Please don't say "show appreciation," because BELIEVE ME, they get their a**es kissed so much you'd think they were granting papal dispensations!(Sorry for any disrepect there)!

[ 04-03-2004, 05:14 PM: Message edited by: kmamom ]