It's funny, because sometimes you think that you are the only one going through a situation and then you read a post like this!!!

I am a 1st year vice-president of a PTO that has relatively done nothing for the past three years and has had basically no parental involvement.

With the help of these discussion forums, I was able to come up with ideas and activities to increase parental involvement. The PTO went from being a group of six parents to over 50 parents in 6 months. However, help for these events is virtually non-existent, even from the other officers of the PTO. The President now works two jobs and does not have the time, the Treasurer does not have a clue and the Secretary has been in this position for the past three years and does not see the need for change so refuses to help. With elections coming this month, my challenge is how to get parents or teachers elected as officers that have the same work ethic that I do, that are willing and able to help and get rid of our current officers. Any ideas on doing this diplomatically??

I have to say "Hang in there." Especially if you get to pick your own board. When you officially make the decision to run (if that is what you do) explain to them that you expect next year's team to pull their weight, that it takes everyone to make things work successfully. I stepped down last year and one reason was fear I couldn't get enough help. I've really regretted that decision too.

I don't know about you but the next couple of months at our school is a whirlwind for everyone. The PTO has several events, everyone is burned out this time of year, and the kids go wild with the weather warming up. It gets tough. You need people who can work together. Perhaps you can talk to your counselor or principal about a Conflict Resolution Training for your board and your volunteers (that way the board won't feel picked on).

LAH.... sometimes you fall into a group of women (and men!) that you hope never go away and well, sometimes ya don't.

I was apart of a "team" a few years ago that made me cry after EVERY signal meeting. I'm not kidding. Why did I stay? I guess I didn't want to give them the satisfaction of know I was that unhappy. Well, also the Principal and the VP begged me to hang in there! I was also President two years ago, my Secretary quit (divorce), Tresurer said she never really ment it when she agreed to run fo the office (I'll keep that one PG ), 9/11, school moved to new building, husband's job and salary were "downsized", AND the bet part of the whole year- my daughter was born! Through it all, I knew if I could just hang on I wouldn't have to be nominated and could step down for awhile. A year later I was back (yes, my mental state has been questioned!) but I am with a great team and the world as we know it much calmer!

Hang in there. And... thank you!!!! for all that you have done! I should add, when our baby was born, the VP stopped by the hospital and we had the best dinner together to celebrate. I haven't seen her much but I will always remember that goofy dinner....call your Treasurer......

To T Marie & Michelle B.: Thanks for your responses. We do have monthly meetings...often frustrating ones, but we have them. Plus, I send out e-mails after the meetings, reviewing key issues/projects. I e-mail the board at least twice a week, if not more, but rarely can get them to respond. The irony with this board is I basically hand picked it myself. We're a small, rural school and our nominations process is somewhat informal-- nominations are placed, the nominees are called and if they want the position, it's theirs. If more than one person wants the position, we'd hold an election. In the four years I've been on the board, I've never seen an election. You can imagine how I must feel since I selected these people. I thought they did have similar goals! We had an informal meeting last week at a local coffee house and I asked each of them if they wanted to return. It wasn't a good meeting. It became too emotional. Of the six, if I'm going to stay, I'd really like three to stay and I think they will. I definitely cannot work with two of them again and the remaining one, I think could be okay to stay on. I don't think the tension and frustration have been projected at meetings. But we are a small school, I don't know what the individual board members have been saying to other parents. I think my reputation for my committment and passion to the PTO/school is fairly well known, but I'm afraid this year, I might have developed a reputation for being difficult and/or demanding. I don't know. I guess I'll find out soon enough. I appreciate your advice. My poor treasurer, who has become a good friend, has functioned this year as my board shrink. I need to stop whining at her about this. We have the most supportive Principal, who has already spent too much of her valuable time on earlier board issues. I've been trying not to involve her in these recent petty, dramas. Nominations are starting now and I think this year I'm just going to sit back and see what happens. If somebody else is dying to be President, I may just turn it all over and wish them the best. Thanks again, for the advice.

Every group has these moments. If you think that as President, you can do better next year than I say don't step down. It is quite clear that the rest of your board is unwilling/unhappy and I would ask what their intentions were as far as wanting to continue. You may not have to ask them to step down, they may already be planning to do so. If they aren't, explain to the VP that you need someone to be your co-pilot, someone that can and will do the work that sometimes is necessary outside of their job descriptions. Do you have a nominating committee? They are generally not required to maintain the current officers on the slate.
As for your volunteers, has the tension within your board created an uninviting environment? Did you put out to the parents/caregivers that you were looking?
Your heart is in the right place but take some time to evaluate your roll on the board. If it's lack of support from the board, then you can likely turn it around with a new fresher board.

wow! I thought I had a stressful first year!
If you want to remain on the board do so and ask for resignations from your problem parents - can the principal help with this?
select new board members who have similar goals and schedule monthly board meetings. meeting with the board once a month made all the difference for me and helped keep us all informed. ggod luck