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I've got into this with such enthusiasm...

14 years 5 months ago #152329 by Mia28
Thank you so much for your responses, I did try so hard to form committees, but in our bylaws chairs of the comeeties become Board members with the right to vote. My board is totally against new members and want people to work only on volunteer base, unfortunately people volounteer only to do some small tasks, chair would actually have a job.
I am still hanging there, mostly because of my treasurer, but I don't know how long I can hold this up. Now we actually have a kind of crisys, because we don't have enough manpower and time to do everything by ourseves, and when I told them, I told you so(not in this exact words) they started to blame me for not doing enough to creat parental involvment LOL.
BTW, nobody, I mean nobody, dared to ask my co-president about her involvment.
Can you explain why? I fell kind of sad, I know it could be great experience, plus I hate to quit, but I feel for my family it'd be the best.
14 years 7 months ago #151770 by Mandi
Hi Mia28,
It's never easy when people and their personalities come together whether it is in a work or volunteer environment.

When a function or topic etc. comes up, I would ask the one who is so outspoken and disagreeable to head it up with their ideas and within the allocated budget. It's easy to sit back and criticize and complain, but things change when you throw it back to the individual to "take in on so to speak." You as President can't do it all and need to break functions down and let another person form the committee to hold some of these folks responsible. It may not always be done exactly to everyone's liking, but you can't do it all and need to delegate and let the "chips fall so to speak" and people will know others were responsible.

Ultimately, if these folks are that hard to get along with, it may be in your best interest to resign. The school will figure out something to get through this year and will realize there are many challenges in this area.

I sense your stress and wish you the best.
14 years 7 months ago #151769 by Lisa @ PTO Today
Replied by Lisa @ PTO Today on topic Re:I've got into this with such enthusiasm...
Mia-
Sorry to hear the situation is draining your enthusiasm! Have you tried the approach of getting the board members together -- not in actual formal meeting -- and saying listen guys we need to talk... and going through your concerns? If not try to be as non-confrontational as possible. Just state the facts and give some possible solutions.

Tim's recent video blog on How to Combat Parent Group Drama may help.

Hang in there. Let us know how you make out.

~Lisa


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14 years 7 months ago #151740 by Mia28
... it's only been 3 months and I'm already exhausted and upset most of the time. I am a new president, well, co-president(it's just, the other one is always absent or busy or sick) of a newly formed PTO. My vice president and the secretary constantly contradict me, on every little thing, they do not let me do or say anything, citing that we have to have a vote on everything. I feel, If I have to fart I have to have a board approval. I'm so tired of this, my personality changing, I'm very social creature and have no problem getting volunteers for anything, but they don't want anybody on board and they're not letting me create committees, they want to be involved in everything, but they don't want to do anything, for example we dragging school party for 3 months already and still bickering about budget for drinks and napkins, of course we can't buy anything until we finalise it. I began to avoid speaking or answering questions parents have, cos I never sure now if I MAY say something or I need board approval for this, because since I'm PTA president I have no voice as a regular parent. I can't even complain or say anything as a regular parent anymore. All but one of my ideas are dismissed, and the one that they actually excepted by now changed without recognition. So much so that it became chore of mine instead of a exciting activity for everybody involved(the party). I'm taking hit after hit. If I'd knew that I'll have a constant opposition instead of cooperation I'd never run for the Board. I can't believe, that they were actually the ones who encouraged me to do run. Now I'm actually thinking of talking to principal and just resign, but I feel kind of sorry for school and for kids, they going to make our PTO non-inviting, stagnant and boring, plus I don't want my child to have any consequences, the principal knows that we fight and I feel like it's my fault, that I couldn't built a good PTO team. I'm still holding up, but barely. I have my treasurer on my side, but that's about it, they always have more votes(my co- is never around so she just votes NO for everything) .
What would you do?
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