If I understand it you are a board member. If you have board meetings can you bring this up privately so that the board can discuss it? Would it be too difficult to continue? Maybe suggest a "brainstorming day" or meeting so that a ton of ideas can get out on the table or a parent survey that you offer to run to see what everyone else thinks. Maybe folks like the way it is done and don't want to deviate.
My next suggestion, and you gonna love this, is run for president next year. It is always good in my mind to switch things around so that you don't get that "in a rut" syndrome. You can run for the Pres's job and offer folks a choice. The way it has always been done, or something new. See which way they go...and then be prepared to workith your buttith off! [img]smile.gif[/img]
Good luck ..and remember small steps are still steps in the right direction!

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Froggy - Funny how no matter the state, county or town all PTO's seem to have similar if not identical issues. Know that each of us have been in the same situation at some time or another. Continuing to volunteer is your best avenue for change. Volunteering is your best chance at breaking the small town barrier - all it takes is one parent. Hang in there ... elections can't be that far off.

Hang in there. Do your job the best you can. Make lots of friends. Greet people by name. Take the high road. And then run for President next year.

I am sorry for what you are going through. Our officers always try to remind eachother when politics get involved and things get heated, that this is just PTO-not in a condesending way- none of us are getting paid, no one (hopefully) is running their own agenda. We are all in it for the kids. Too bad your president might have forgotten that. Remember the old saying "Give a little person a little power..."

I am not defending your president but if an event goes wrong even if the president had nothing to do with the planning, it is the president's fault in the eyes of the people :eek: . So, while they may be handling it incorrectly I can understand checking up on coordinators and such. In regards to the new parent at a meeting, if that happens again maybe as an officer you could approach the new person at the meeting and thank them for sharing the idea and make them feel welcome. If you get enough sincere parents getting involved, it may help shift the flow of control.

Having said all that, don't give up. Your school needs people like you [img]smile.gif[/img]

Hi all,

I am new to the message board and I have been scrolling the board all day trying to find a glimmer of help with my situation. I am hopeful someone has an insight that I haven't thought of.

So here is the problem; we have a very small town and our school is small as well. Everyone knows everyone and grew up together. My husband and I relocated here after the military. So, we didn't know anyone. Which we didn't think would be a big deal. Turns out we were wrong.

We both joined PTO and became very involved and volunteer as much as we can considering we both work 45 hours plus a week. This year we are both officers and we have a very controlling President. This person has to know everything, anyone is doing and if they don't they are mad!

To make matters worse we don't even have bylaws for our group and the same clique has been in and out of the same positions since we have been at this school. Two years going on three. So I don't even feel as if I have recourse against this person. I really don't think they do it on purpose but, it's the snide comments, or if I have to hear "that's not the way we did it last year" one more time, I swear my head's going to blow off.

Now I understand that a project needs consistency to be successful and that a major overhaul is not always a good idea. But, when an idea is presented and a person has done all the research, and offers to do all the setup and run with it and still it is shot down because the President didn't think of it... I'm over there scribbling minutes ready to burst.

For example one new parent at the first meeting of this year came and was really excited and trying to ask questions and seemed genuinely interested. The same core clique kept shooting him dirty looks, haven't seen the poor sole since then.

I think if my Husband had not joined with me I would have quit somewhere along my Daughter's Kindergarten year because of this person. Now he is the President and influencing the whole group!! I just don't know what impact I or my Husband can make on the situation to make the rest of the year bearable.

I am at a loss truly since he is really sweet to me when others are around but if we meet in the hall and no one is around I get a dirty look.

Any advice? I am not trying to change him Lord knows that is a task that will surely fail but, I need to know I am not crazy! I also am not going to give up and let him drive me away. My child would suffer if I did and that is not an option!!

Thanks for reading!