I take on lot myself because if I didn't then there would be no bookfairs or family fun nights... I do get volunteers, same ones as last time. Thank God for them. I did have one parent complain during the bookfair, she said I should do 2 hr. time slots & not one. I told her I did 1 hr. slots because some parents really do want to help & come in on their lunch hr. & if they can do more time, they check it off. I can't win for trying. I do enjoy planning the events. I do it for the kids, not the parents. There are times I fill in the blanks.

Mich, I like your observation!

I'm very frustrated with my school's group. The main people are always b****ing that it's the same people doing things and "no one ever helps." Somehow this doesn't bother me for the same reasons it bothers them. They feel put upon, resent that no one is helping them and are angry that they give so "selflessly" to others who don't appreciate them. They fail to see that once you become a self-made martyr, you're really no longer a true "martyr." It bothers me because parents either aren't getting the message that being involved in their kids' school in ANY way is important, or they just don't care.

I do the things I do because--gasp--I like doing them! Would it be nice to see more people helping, and would it take a load off? Sure! Would it be uplifting to see parents think a little more about others than themselves--definitely! Is it worth staying angry at people for not being involved, or who criticize the work we do? No. Why waste that energy? Any time someone complains I always invite them to show me how to do it better. Usually this shuts those people up, but every now and then you get a treat and someone CAN do it better (Bonus--everyone comes out ahead!), and they find that doing it IS fun and worthwhile, and some of the workload is taken off.

Do I resent people for not helping or not putting their money where their mouth is? A little, maybe, but in the long run I rather feel sorry for them. It's not just rhetoric that your kids are only young once. As we all know--the older we get the faster time goes, and before you know it--the kids are gone and moving on with their own lives. I'd like to be there to share my time with them for as long as I can. For all the agita and crap I've taken this week, and believe me--it's been a lot--I'm starting to calm down and have realized my direction was a little off course. I'm back to just trying to do the best I can do, and enjoying myself as much as I can. I think if you succeed in doing this, the example you set helps everyone else fall into line.

Well said Shawn. Before my school closed I was the only one wanting to do anything. I was there for the kids not to b**** about the school system.There would have been no book fairs or Family Fun Nights if I didn't organize it all myself. I did everything from planning to set-up. I did have a couple helpers for set-up. Boy did I hug them. I did get volunteers but I had to beg at least 3 times. under my breath I kept saying, "I'm doing this for the kids!!!" I only did it because I would not break their hearts and canx FFN. I'm not afraid to tell anyone off either & my kids are fine.

I have this on a business card with the first couple of lines.. then 'SEE Note in Teacher Lunchroom' and the whole poem is posted in the teachers lounge and will be by the front gate.

It Only takes a Few

A group of ten Cared about kids,
and one had an idea that was very fine.
But one was asked to donate money,
and now there are only nine.

Nine caring people,
Thought helping kids would be great.
But one was asked to commit some spare time,
and now there are only eight.

Eight thought that a new youth center,
would be a special gift from heaven.
But one was asked to join a committee,
and now there are only seven.

Seven concerned about juvenile crime,
wished it was something that they could fix.
But one was asked to spend time with a teen.
And now there are only six.

Six were thankful for the gifts,
they had inquired in their lives.
But when asked about planned giving,
the six soon became five.

Five were frustrated,
wishing for just a few more.
But one was tired of people leaving,
and suddenly there are four.

Four people asking themselves,
will the next one be me?
One asked the question too many times,
now they are down to three.

With only three remaining,
and so much work to do,
one decides to just give up on kids,
and now there are only two.

But the two that remain are leaders,
and to help kids they will find some more.
They each call up their best friend,
and suddenly there are four.

Four friends who share a common thought,
helping kids is great.
They each recruit their own banker,
and now their team is eight.

Soon these eight recruit eight more,
and I think you will begin to see,
that the number of people helping kids,
can start with you and me.

Now you can be like the eight who left,
or be more like the final two.
but when you make the decision,
just please remember...it only takes a few.

I know I've peeved a few people off.. but as I always tell 'em. I not here to win a popularity contest, run the school or tell you what to do.

I'm here for my kids and your kids education. I dont lose sleep if someone doesnt like me or my ways.

(UN)Fortunately depending on how its looked at (and so far my kids havent gotten any unfair treatment) even a few of the Local and State people probably have dartboards in thier office with my picture smiling right back at 'em. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[ 11-18-2005, 02:58 AM: Message edited by: Shawn ]

Not much you can say. I find that 90% of the work is done by the same 12-18 parents (out of about 250 families that is less than 10%). We get another few dozen that will help out with 1 or 2 events - on the day of the event not with any of the planning for it.

As a first year Co-Pres - and one who expects to stay in the position 2-3 more years - I am getting worried about what will happen when some of the "do-ers" graduate after next year. I plan continually pointing out all the things the PTO does and who is doing them and keep beating the drum for volunteers.

I'll keep an eye posted to see if anyone has better ideas.

I read the post about people who always do things the same way. But my favorite is when parents say "You never ask for help." "You Always Ask for too much." "You're not doing this or that or the other." I one day I can hear all of these comments from different parents. I always want to introduce them to each other and say, "She thinks I ask too much, and you think I don't ask enough, and you say I'm not doing this."

Are they all reading the same newsletters? I sometimes wonder if they really have children at our school. They can't possibly be coming to the same meetings and reading the same things.

What do you say to them?