I am relieved to hear others have this issue, but also sad that it happens so much that there need be a discussion on it. I too have just been elected PTO pres. I also have inherited what I call my "problem child". I have already had too many issues with her. My problem is that she is the 2nd Vice Pres. We only elect the pres., v.pres and 2nd V.pres. in the fall. She's returning (we had a screwy election process). One of the first things I did was have myself and the v.presidents sign a "code of conduct". I actually got the form off of this website [img]smile.gif[/img] (thank you)
She had a big issue with it, but I got her to sign it. Now I guess I just wait. So far all of my approaches with her have not really worked.
As already mentioned, don't let this person bring you down. Your focus should be the kids. Easier said than done, but, if you let them run you, then they have won!! GOOD LUCK and CONGRATULATIONS on your win.
I would call the local police and ask if she is violating any law. (She probably is.) The next time she comes to a meeting, the PTO pres could let her know that you all hope she will remain in control of herself because you will no longer allow such disruptive and illegal behavior. Then, if she does get out of hand, ask her to leave. If she chooses not to leave, call the police right there in front of her on your cell phone. After that, file a restraining order for her not to attend meetings.
Yes, this type of behaviour is EVERYWHERE . . . .some parents don't get involved for their children, but for their own selfish reasons which is where the "bad attitudes" come from. If they had their own child's well being in mind, they wouldn't behave like this.
We have a handful of parents like this at our school and one was banned bythe school board because her and her ex husband got into a fist fight in the hallway just before dismissal. The ex then got his son in a head lock which caused students to run screaming that his dad is trying to kill him.
To this day, this parent is STILL calling the Principal stirring up trouble for our PTO committee but our principal just lets her rant and doesn't take it any further because she knows that her rant is not about the children, but about her personality conflicting with other parents personalities . . ..
KEEP YOU HEAD UP and NEVER let a parent stop you from doing good for the students!!! They should always be your number one priority for the things that your group does . ..hands down!!!!!!
Thank you for your replies. It makes me feel better knowing that it's not just our school.
I guess I just don't understand why someone would go out of their way to create strife in an elementary school PTA office!
The principal is working on it -- the woman never actually put her hands on me, and the threats were implied, but still. It's not the first time she's come in the school making a big fuss. And the past few PTA presidents were very, very nice, but afraid of conflict. Luckily, that's not me. I'm not here to make friends. Just a great school.
We actually had two moms get into a fight at an evening event held at the elementary school a few years ago. It was mostly verbal but escalated to some physical stuff. The police were called immediately.
The deputy got them outside as quickly as possible, so very few actually saw the argument. Luckily, the kids are so used to the sheriff's deputy coming by for educational reasons, no one thought twice about the police car parked at the curb.
I'm not sure that either was charged. (I don't know the details, but one seemed to be more at fault than the other.) Any way at least the one deemed to be the instigator was banned from campus.
Most schools have taken the "No Tolerance" stance on violence and I don't understand why your principal has not handled this already. I would not only inform your school's or district's security the next time you know she will be in attendance as well as informing the super that this is happening on school grounds. As far as banning someone from the group, we did not have to do it because the person realized they weren't welcome but I did personally go to every member and let them know of my feelings for wanting to get rid of someone who wanted to threaten and harass me and had it come to it would have had support to remove the person from their position on the board. So communicate with the rest of your group on this.
The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating-in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life. --Anne Morris
