You didn't mention anything about the socioeconomic situation in your school. Is it possible that the parent cannot afford proper hygiene? If that is the case then I applaud her for sending the child to school, and I think there may be some things that could help. Contact a local dentist and ask him/her to do a presentation in the class and to donate toothbrushes and toothpaste to all of the kids. It won't look like you are singling out this one child. Have the nurse do a presentation on hygiene and ask a hotel to donate little bars of soap. Maybe this child could turn his/her own home around if he/she is not the only one with the problem. If this won't work - make up a bag of hygiene products, even in a brown paper bag, and slip it in the child's desk, locker or backpack - the child and his/her parents don't need to know that this wasn't a classwide or schoolwide project.

Your heart is in the right place and we need more teachers in America like you.

Thanks for your responses! We have actually contacted the school social worker about it, but she says we can't do anything until we have concrete proof. I know that the mother is intimidated by the schools (she's actually the same age as me...22) and I've been thinking about sending her home notes that tell when her child is doing well (rather than the typical "your child is acting up" note that she sometimes gets) and then maybe calling her to see if she can come in and just watch sometime...no responsibilities needed, just to watch. I've taken over full control of the classroom now so I feel like I can do things more of the way I would like to. Maybe I'm just being naive but I really think she's just scared, I would like to just ease into it and show her that I don't look down on her or anything of that nature. The principal and social worker seem to think that her child is a drug baby, so that would make it even more intimidating. At any rate, any further information would be appreciated and I thank you again for your replies!! [img]smile.gif[/img]

Welcome new kid,
I'm going to echo c. brooks' comment that perhaps the school counselors need to be involved. It's in the child's best interest--if hygeine and basic needs aren't being met, there's a problem there that needs to be solved before you can tackle the education part.
As for getting parents involved, one thing we did was send out a questionaire soliciting help, but it listed the various forms that help could involve( reading to/with a student, running copies, correcting papers, lunch monitor, laminating papers etc.) with little check boxes and also the days/times that would work for them. While we didn't get a large response, we did use those as a basis for our call list. The principal also instituted a monthly chat & chew. It is a get together where parents can come for a snack and determine what will be the agenda for that particular session. In the beginning, the principal asks what those attending would like to discuss/get answers to and that's what the rest of the meeting comprises. It has been very productive because it has helped the principal see what the parents REALLY want to know or would like to see done. It has helped make parents feel much more comfortable about being at the school and to know that they ARE welcome. The first time I went to the school, I was intimidated too because I wasn't sure what I could do, but I wanted to help. I got pushy( in a nice way) till I found my niche. Most parents don't have the time or personality to do that, so you have to toss out tidbits to get them comfy and interested.To get more interested in attending the chat & chew, we put a teaser in the next newsletter that mentions what was discussed--not too much info, just enough to pique their interest.
Sorry this is so lengthy, but if I gave you everything I knew on the subject,my fingers would be cramping( hehe, kidding)--keep coming here and reading all the other posts, there's a lot of wise people here to help you.

[ 03-01-2003: Message edited by: sherwoodpkmom ]</p>

Welcome to the real world new kid! Though I am not a teacher I have been a substitute teacher aide for two years, a volunteer for 3 years and a mom for 8 years. If the mom is neglecting her child the way it sounds maybe you need to speak privately with your school's guidance counselor or principal to see what the appropriate steps should be taken. Worse case scenerio (or maybe better for the child) DSS may need to step in.
As far as regular parents not wanting to participate, are you sure they are unwilling or not sure? When I first started volunteering I was very intimadated by the teachers and staff and when I found out the teachers were just as scared of the parents my whole outlook changed, communication is key, if you have a weekly newsletter give them options on what they can do to help. Some parents would rather run off papers, and others would rather read with or to the children.
Sorry this is so lengthy but I just wanted to give you all the information I knew on the subject.

Hello! I'm new to the forum, (and not actually a parent!) but I am doing my student teaching in a first grade classroom. The main problem we seem to have is getting unwilling parents involved with their children. I didn't know where to turn, so I've been conducting a somewhat broad search for opinions looking for good ideas to try. I know you must deal with unwilling/stubborn parents at times so I was hoping you could give me some tips! The main situation we have is that the mother doesn't take care of her child (hygiene, clothing, etc) and she never attends appointments and doesn't help her child at home whatsoever with schoolwork. I know this situation may happen when I get my own room and I'm just interesting in hearing everything everyone has to say on the topic. Sorry it's a long post but I wanted to give as much info as possible. Thanks!

[ 02-28-2003: Message edited by: TheNewKid ]</p>