We had a parent run for Prez telling parents she is better qualified for the position because her children are older (HS age) and won't 'get in the way' or be an issue for her to volunteer. The other gal had two children in elem. and talked about the work she had done that year at school.
Both women were Presidents the following two years and while one was more popular than the other, gal with the younger students was able to relate better to parents with daycare issues than the other gal (she just handed people her home phone number so they could call her daughter).
You gotta do what you gotta do to do the job but I frimly stand my kids are my responsiblity. It's a touchy topic. I do agree with Crystal if I'm involved in a play and my oldest wants a part, okay BUT her homework and grades come first. She has yet to go to the skating parties I organized the past 3 years!

Constructive insite- pat, you need to discuss your insight (NOT ISSUES) with a board member. "I would like to be more involved with the PTO but never know when there is a meeting? The play was great, how did you pull it off without advertiseing the need for help? Here is my phone number AND (if you want) e-mail address, please call me I would really love to do what I can!"
I wouldn't go to the school about this, I would talk to other parents though, see how they feel.

I hope I'm making sense, and I may not get to be the Room Mom I want to be right now, I will in five years. I have been on my Board for three years and have seen more than I signed up for at times. I do what I can knowing I can help more in the future ( my kids are 11, 5, 3, 1 and one more coming in 10 weeks).
Ask your child(ren) what they see. Ask your children how they feel about your involvement...I was surprised and happy with the answer I got. It's what keeps me going.

Thank you very much for your comments. I appreciate the information regarding meetings, accounting, and elections. Very helpful. Also, as a matter of fact, I am an active parent -- I have participated in every fundraising activity at the school; I have donated to teacher luncheons and special student cultural luncheons. I volunteer with my son's classroom and help the teacher by checking out books she needs at the public library. I worked last year's Silent Auction including setting up and cleaning up. I am not a complainer and will gladly do what is needed. The fact that I care enough to come to this website to learn more about PTO's should be noted, as well. The thing is, when it comes to school activities, all children should be given a fair and equal opportunity to participate (not guarantee!) when the PTO is using donated money to fund such an activity. Period. When the expenditure of funds is being used for Board Member's children first, no matter how wonderful and active that adult may be, it is impossible to say that the Board is trying to better the school for all children. Sadly, here is an admission of "perks" for Board member's children. I am not surprised by this, just disappointed that the first response to my posting confirmed that "favoritism" appears to be the norm. Politics as usual.

[ 01-19-2002: Message edited by: patw ]</p>

We have monthly general meetings and a treasurers report is handed out to all who attend. The board meets a week before the general meeting to figure out the agenda.

Regarding nominees for board members. To be president, you have had to have been on the board in any capacity previously. Any other position is open. We form a nominating committee, but it basically just consists of trying to convince people to run for an office. I'm a VP this year, my first year on the board. We have 6 board members this year- only the secretary is returning from last year. Our president was on the board two years ago, took a year off, then ran for president this year. We don't have any stipulations for running for office (while requiring meeting attendance sounds great, it would severely limit who's able to run).

I'm surprised your board does things the way you mentioned. Meetings should be open to the public- you'd think they'd want help and want people interested in becoming board members. I'd approach the president and ask why there are no general meetings.

I've been a PTO President for two years and a VP for one. I have been my kids room mother for the past seven years so I think I can answer your questions with a small bit of knowledge behind my answers. (1) In regards to your schools theatrical performance...did your child want to be in the play and not get chosen? Do you volunteer to help? A play with that many children it is a huge undertaking, and if you think about it this way if you were devoting a large amount of time and energy to aid in this production wouldn't you want your child to be a part of it....would you do it if they weren't? If the board members are the ones working their tails off to coordinate this play (fundraising, dealing with the theatrical company, and having to be there during all of it) and the parents who are not volunteering to help are the ones complaining I'd have to say next year HELP OUT MORE!!! I know that may sound harsh but I have dragged my kids to school functions that I have worked and taken time away from my family at home to be PTO President too many times to count and if they happen to want to be in a play that I'm working on then yes they have a right to be in it. I have heard all the excuses why parents can't be active...work, no babysitter, etc. Well I have those same responsibilites and I manage to be at every event to pitch in and help. So if my kids get a few perks because I am there all the time I feel it is their due for all the time that is taken from them because I want to better the school for EVERY student.

(2) YES you should have general membership meetings with a Treasurer's report at each meeting. Do you have by-laws in place?? If not you really need them. The way our by-laws are written we present a budget at the first meeting of the year to be approved by the membership. Anything not on that budget has to be approved by the membership if it is over $50.00, unless it is an emergency situation that can't wait, then we as the executive board and that includes the Principal can approve an expenditure up to $200.00 and present it at the next membership meeting. We have meetings every month.

(3) Concerning nominees for board positions, to run for an office a member has to pay their $5.00 dues and have attended at least half of all the membership meetings. We as the executive board go through the sign in sheets from each meeting to calculate who has been to at least half of the meetings...and surprise surprise it is usually only the officers who qualify...I place an ad in every newsletter and agenda to let people know this policy because we would love a break and have new officers. But perhaps because your school is only 1 1/2 old they need time to work out all the "bugs" so to speak.

My advice to you would half to be try to be involved, many officers think no one wants to help and feel they have to do it all...and if you do take on a project see it through to the end. Most importantly realize that officers are voulunteering precious time to help improve your child's school...because we do care about all the kids...not just our own [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[ 01-19-2002: Message edited by: chrystal ]</p>

I am the mother of a first-grader who attends a school that has been open 1 1/2 years. The PTO Board (18 Board members) does not invite the general membership to meetings. All meetings are termed "Board Meetings". The PTO has just sponsored (monetarily) a school drama performance in which an outside company provides direction, costumes, sets, etc.,for 62 children out of a school population of more than 700. Children were selected on a first come-first serve application basis. Problem: all children of Board members who turned in applications were chosen to participate in the play -- although a friend and Board member admits not all those applications were the first to arrive.

Problem #2: The Board selects nominees for election to the next Board. Our last ballot had one name next to each position. All were previous Board members. There is no forum for membership discussion or nominations. Also, there is no accounting of funds provided to the membership.

Am I being naive, or is this the type of behavior I should expect from so-called responsible adults? I would greatly appreciate any recommendations or comments, expecially info on standard bylaws and rules of conduct for a PTO. Thank you so much.