PTO2004- Welcome to the boards!

Welcome to my Hell!

We're finding our principal is...less than willing to work with others, REFUSES to admit when she's wrong or doesn't know something, is full of contradictory statements and policies and generally is beginning to concern us--especially since she REFUSES to hear anything that is less than complimentary of the school/teachers. If there is a problem somewhere, and you REFUSE to acknowledge that it could POSSIBLY exist, how can the problem be fixed?

You definitely DON'T want to gossip, but you DO want to let the membership know that YOU are not the problem. Keep everything positive. A member of mine has been instrumental in teaching me how to relate what we need and what our concerns are without using the words "don't," you're not," "didn't," "can't" etcetera. Everything is stated in the positive terms possible--we explain what we need and WHY WE NEED IT. Of course she ignores us, but I don't want us being accused of "making demands." YES--if working with her is NOT working--go to your superintendent--but NICELY. DON'T make demands. Express your concerns, and why they're bothersome. As our super explained to us when we finally felt pushed to seek his help--that's part of his job. And believe this--they generally have NO idea what actually goes on in a school unless the parents/PTO comes to them. I'm communicating with our superintendent and BOE IN WRITING to let them know our concerns and the issues that are arising.

I was more afraid of not being taken seriously because of that perception we were somehow whiners for "not getting our way," or coming off as the demanding parent who knows bettter than everyone else what needs to be done. I now realize that we have legitimate concerns--it's more than a cancelled event or not being permitted to do something. These negative things our principal is engaging in as far as the PTO/PTA goes are merely sympomatic of much larger issues, such as truthfulness, acknowleging the need for parental involvement, willingness to go out of one's way both on administrative and faculty levels to make sure the children are having their educational needs met--which DOES extend beyond book learning in the classroom, and a while host of other things.

My suggestion--keep it as positive as possible (and BELIEVE ME, I know how hard that can be to do), communicate not just what you NEED (notice I didn't say WANT), but also WHY you need it. Arrange a meeting with your super/BOE president--explain to them your concerns, and don't forget--you're a tax-paying parent in the school system--you DO have a right to request things AS LONG AS THEY DON'T INTERFERE WITH YOUR CHILD'S EDUCATION.

Good Luck!

Once again it sounds like our principal and PTO relationship. Ours though wants to manage how we do things, she decided we were to unorganized and appointed her sec. as our treas., when we have one that is completely capable. She appointed the teacher reps. as our sec. We are trying to find our by-laws to show her she cannot do this, don't they have to be voted into those positions? Isn't the principal's role in the PTO as an advisor, not a decision maker or someone who can put in people on the board? I hope you are able to work something out, we are just about ready to let her have control over the whole show(that's what I think she and her sec. want) even though I don't know why, don't they have plenty to do with school business?? THanks for listening, I know I didn't give ya anything to help out!! cj

Originally posted by PTO2004:
We have a fairly new and young principal. She seems to think that she can tell us what we can and can't do and cancels things because of her own personal conflicts. She has effectively ruined all of our previous programs.
Parents are complaining but most of them don't realize that she is the one who is causing the problems and we don't wish to be gossips. What can we do? Should we go over her head?
Please help! any suggestions are welcome.
Thanks

Hillview, perhaps there was some miscommunication there. When I first read "too involved", I thought perhaps in decisions of how things are done. Perhaps she just wants to be a support and not get in the way since your parent group is doing such a great job.

PTO2004- I agree with LUV. She needs to hear fromt the parents. In calm setting of course. She will probably mellow out some when she gets her bearings. Is that her first year ever as a principal? She will probably learn alot this year and I am sure her ideas will change as she learns.

Wow, are you a member of our PTO? The only difference is that we haven't had a meeting involving our new principal yet. When I finally got her to commit to a date for our first meeting, she told me that she would have to talk to other area principals to see what their level of involvement is in their respective PTOs. She then proceeded to tell me that she thought our old principal had "too much involvement"! Is there such a thing? Yes, our old principal was involved in our PTO. She was one of the first ones in with her sleeves rolled up ready to work! Our old principal did not have kids at our school; they are both in high school. Our new principal has 3 here!! Shouldn't she want our PTO to succeed, at least to benefit her kids? Our PTO serves such an important purpose at our school: We give each of the teachers $100 of classroom money to cover what the district will not buy, we bought honor roll magnetic bumper stickers, we buy playground equipment and inside entertainment for rainy days...The list is endless. Is our PTO going to fizzle because our new principal doesn't want to get involved? In our bylaws, it states that the principal is a non-voting member of the executive board. I think we are well and truly stuck!!!!

Ask if she would meet with a small group of parents(your board for example) to discuss the role of the PTO in your school. Tell her what you have done in the past and what you envision for the future, then ask her what she sees your group doing. You can then look for common goals, and maybe even make some compromises.

Remember, she is responsible for the operation of the school. She may feel a little overwhelmed or even threatened by all the involvement your group has in her building.

Make sure to go into the meeting with a positive attitude and an open mind. Be friendly and supportive. Remember you already have one common goal-providing your children with the best education possible!